Saturday, November 27, 2010

What is Love?

The dictionary defines love as a tender, passionate affection and concern for the well-being of another person.  Love is so many things that it is hard to describe adequately.  I don't know if our finite minds can truly understand all the depths and hidden parts of true love, but here is my humble attempt to define what love means to me.

Love is not just a feeling, it is a choice and a commitment. It cannot truly be expressed or given without God’s help.  Love spills over from the core of who you are. It is expressed and experienced in 1000 different ways. It always takes into account the recipients needs. It lives to die. Loving someone means trusting them to love you back – even the ugly parts. Love is a gift from God – a picture of His supernatural love for us. Love protects and defends, it never abandons or exposes. When you love someone, you ache for them every minute you’re apart. You want to please them, you want to help them be everything God meant for them to be. Love is an investment – an investment in another person, and an investment in eternity. You commit to constantly learn and appreciate this person and you acknowledge the importance of your relationship in God’s kingdom. The way you love is a spotlight – it illuminates God’s love for humanity and His love for each of you. Your love is an example to those around you – to your friends, family, and someday, your children. Love is a lesson that you will learn over and over again. It is something that you need to teach each other and those around you. It is beautiful and sometimes scary. It is not something you fall in and out of. It is the backbone of a relationship. It has the power to hold everything together.

What is love to you?

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Sighing a Breath of Relief

Finally!  Neurology is over!  Hip-hip-hooray!  My mood was about a bazzilion times better today, and I felt like my shoulders actually moved when I took a breath!!!  I couldn't be more extatic to be moving onto soft tissue service!  I even get to do a ovariohysterectomy tomorrow!!!  And we have a really interesting case of a dermoid sinus in a chocolate lab that is going to surgery tomorrow as well!  It's going to be a fabulous week.  Still have long hours, still won't know all the answers, but at least now I can breathe!

Oh, and I'm super-duper missing my man right now!  He accidentally left some clothes here from when he came to visit this weekend and they smell so much like him I can't stop!  It's stupid, I know, but what's a girl to do when her man is 200 miles away?  :)  Anyway.  There are still times when I have worries about how we'll handle certain things in the future, but more and more, I just am overwhelmed with affection for him both when we're apart and when we're together.  He's so sweet and takes good care of me!  He helped me buy a phone, cleaned out my shower drain, and did the dishes this weekend!!!  I know, right?  What a keeper!

Stay tuned!!!

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Stressed to the Max

I feel so heavy right now.  Just so completely weighted down by everything that is going on.  I absolutely hate neurology service.  I thought it was getting better, but then I was attacked again in rounds today.  My brain just shuts down when they start asking me questions in a certain tone.  It won't back up, go forward, anything - it just dies!  I looked so incompetent today.  It's just so frustrating and discouraging it makes me want to cry!
On top of it all, I think I might be getting sick!  I was able to fight it off a couple of weeks ago, but putting in these kind of hours and being in a constant state of stress for such a long period of time is really wearing me down.  Rem is supposed to come up this weekend, but he's been really busy too.  If he doesn't come, I think that will further push me into even more discontentment and angst.
I can't wait till next Wednesday when we switch to Soft Tissue Surgery - it's gonna be like heaven!  Just please, Lord, get me through till then.  Please calm my mind and help me remember the things I learned about the nervous system.  I know the information is up in my brain somewhere.

Saturday, November 6, 2010

Disappearing Act

So if you were wondering, yes, I'm still alive.  I haven't disappeared off the face of the earth.  I just live at the hospital now.  Speaking of, I have 10 pm treatments (whoops).  I'd better go get those puppies taken care of.  Neurology is horrible and I can't wait for the next week and a half to be over.  And in 23 days I'll be home for a while - which I am completely and totally living for right now!