I can't do this without You

Lord God, please help me.  I can't do this alone.  I need Your help!  5 days. 1 quiz.  5 tests.  1 very tired, very scared, very discouraged girl.  It's in Your hands - I give it to You.

I need You to hold me together

"You said You'd never leave or forsake me

When You said this life is gonna shake me

And You said this world is gonna bring trouble on my soul

This I know

When everything falls apart Your arms hold me together

When everything falls apart You're the only hope for this heart

When everything falls apart and my strength is gone

I find You mighty and strong, You keep holding on

You keep holding on

When I see the darkness all around me

When I see that tragedy has found me

I still believe Your faithful arms will never let me go

And still I know

When everything falls apart Your arms hold me together

When everything falls apart You're the only hope for this heart

When everything falls apart and my strength is gone

I find You mighty and strong, You keep holding on

You keep holding on

Sorrow will last for the night

But hope is rising with the sun, it's rising with the sun

There will be storms in this life

But I know You will overcome, You have overcome

When everything falls apart Your arms hold me together

When everything falls apart You're the only hope for this heart

When everything falls apart and my strength is gone

I find You mighty and strong, You keep holding on

When everything falls apart Your arms hold me together

When everything falls apart You're the only hope for this heart

When everything falls apart and my strength is gone

I find You mighty and strong, You keep holding on

You keep holding on

You can hope, you can rise, you can stand

He's still got the whole world in His hands

You can rise, you can hope, and you can stand

He's still got the whole world, the whole world in his hands

The whole world in His hands"

Oh God...  I'm falling apart.  Please hold me.

On the edge

Well, I made it through another week.  God pulled me through these first two tests.  I can't pretend that the next two don't worry me still - they're the classes where my grades are the lowest.  I hate this feeling.  The uncertainty, the barely containable fear, the unanswered "what-if's".  I am trying so desperately to cling to His promise.  To hold fast to the love I know He has for me.  To let go of what I want so badly.  It is a constant struggle - I feel like I'm always balancing on the side of a cliff and any small breeze may push me over the edge.  I pray that I will be diligent and wise.  I pray that I will be strong enough to survive, whatever the outcome.

Whew! What a day!

(Sigh)  I am so ready for a nap!  Open House went really well!  Tons of people came and that's always good for the Vet School.  Griswald was a hit!  He was such a good boy, letting people pet him and performing his tricks for the adoring public!  I love him!  My family came up too, which was nice.  They just left a little while ago.  I am a little disappointed that no one else from home came though.  I told the Sunday School Social Director about it around 3 weeks ago in hopes that she would at least send an e-mail to the class.  Just kind of hurt that the people that say they love me and are my friends don't really seem to care or want to be a part of my life.  Oh well.  Sometimes I like my non-Christian friends here better anyway.  They honestly treat me better sometimes.

Good news - two of my tests for next week were moved back so we have more time to study!  And they're the classes that my grades are lower in too!  God definitely answers prayer!  I'm going to do my best to take advantage of this and study my butt off!  This block is super frightening.  Thinking on it too much puts me in deer-in-the-headlights mode!  But God did not give us a spirit of fear, so I will trust in Him to carry me through this yet again!

If you're reading this, please pray for me next week - I need all the help I can get!!!

Here We Go....

I'm facing an uphill climb towards next week - the dreaded test week from you-know-where!  This week is relativly calm-looking comparatively speaking.  Until you look at all the meetings and errands that still need to be done before the whirlwind arrives. 

God has given me a promise, however, and I will not be afraid (I'm going to try not to be anyway).  He sent me a sign not 10 minutes after I had begun to worry and pray about my school situation.  It made me cry and smile and realize how much my Jesus really cares about my life and loves me sooooo wonderfully!

So I am going to do my best to work hard this week and prepare for what is next.  If I do my best, He will see me through - just like He has so far.  And if everything should fall to pieces, I will run to Him for comfort and cling to Him through my sorrow.